Not walking the talk

Ever heard of the old adage, doctors need to take their own advice?

I don’t quite have MBBS under my belt yet but I definitely need to take heed of what I preach to others. Odd sleeping patterns, unhealthy food choices, alcohol and its excess calories, lack of physical activity have all become a part of my daily regimen.

Truth be told, I am a complete wreck. Everyday is a conscious effort to remind myself of what a privilege it is to be doing what I’m doing, to be learning on the go, to have this opportunity to serve people.

I am emotionally and physically drained. And these days I run on caffeine and PRN beer and STAT cab sav. The stress of passing and graduating from med school, expectations to meet, job contracts, failed relationships have taken a huge toll on me. I’ve cried in toilet cubicles. Spoken in higher octaves to mask true feelings. Fallen asleep with books splayed across the floor. Life is a continuum, and its lines don’t always travel linearly, but however zig-zagged it may be, and however broken I am…

I am going to keep fighting. And I’ll go down fighting if I have to.

Just another one of those note to self posts. This is as far as "Self Help" goes.